To be empathic, you have to think beyond yourself and your own concerns. Once you see beyond your own world, you’ll realize that there’s so much to discover and appreciate.People who are accused of being egotistical and selfish, or lacking perspective, have often missed the big picture: that they are only one person in a world with billions of other people If you’ve been called any of these things, then remind yourself that the world is full of other people, and you can’t escape their influence on your life. It’s far better to accept this, and to decide to build relationships and understanding, rather than try to stand alone all of the time.Self-control is the capacity to override an impulse in order to respond appropriately. We use self-control when we eat carrots instead of Krispy Kreme donuts, when we forgive instead of freak out and when we pay attention instead of day dream.Self-control helps us manage motivational conflicts. A motivational conflict is when motivations clash in ways that prevent action. People have many motivations, most of which benefit themselves and society. Our motivation to eat arises out a natural concern to ensure our own survival. Motivations to seek affiliation and to protect ourselves and loved ones from harm also offer examples of basic, fundamental motivations that promote individual and collective well-being.Yet, self-control can prevent us from engaging in motivated behaviors. People have natural motivations to survive by eating, but they use self-control to resist their temptation to eat unhealthy foods. Natural motivations to reproduce through sexual intercourse must be overridden through the use of self-control in order to follow standards for appropriate sexual behavior. And motivations to harm offenders are disregarded through self-control because forgiving others fosters individual, social and cultural well-being.Integrity is a term used to describe a person’s level of honesty, moral commitments, and willingness to do what’s right. For example, we expect our doctors to be honest with us about diagnoses, not prescribe medications we don’t need, and generally work in the best interest of our health and well-being. We expect this because, in most societies, doctors are perceived to be people of great integrity with strong moral compasses.Conversely, if your doctor didn’t have any integrity, he or she might be strongly influenced by drug companies or bribes and might talk you into getting tests or procedures you don’t need. When this happens, society takes a dim view of that person—and in some cases legal charges are brought—because he or she was expected to act with integrity.In academic contexts and scholarly work, integrity is of tremendous importance. For example, when college professors write books or perform experiments, it is expected that their theories and assertions are backed up by rigorous research for which they provide citations. In cases where it has been discovered that someone has falsified research data or outright lied, that person can face a number of consequences because he or she was expected to work with honesty and integrity.In embracing diversity, we must appreciate the richness of difference that exists in our human family, empathize with all types of people, and end discrimination. The human race is extraordinarily diverse in so many ways. Gender, ethnicity, race, class, religion, nationality, sexuality, philosophy, lifestyle. The areas in which we differ are endless.Yet, at a basic level, we are all of the same human species. We experience highs and lows in life and strive to be happy and fulfilled. Our common pains and joys are what bring us together, but our diversity makes us unique. It is what deems you your own special person, one who has never existed and will never exist again.Grit is a personality trait possessed by individuals who demonstrate passion and perseverance toward a goal despite being confronted by significant obstacles and distractions. Those who possess grit are able to self-regulate and postpone their need for positive reinforcement while working diligently on a task.If one wants to become excellent at anything, be it basketball, algebra, public speaking, healthy eating, money management, or organization, they must commit to avoiding distractions and persevering when challenges arise. Talent, intelligence, and circumstance may all play a role in achieving success, but it is really the quality of grit that will prove to be most critical in your life. There really is no way around it; working hard is necessary if you want to achieve what you want.

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